Estimated Reading Time: 7 mins
Introduction
“You are what you think, all day long” — the famous words of Dr. Joseph Murphy.
What you put in is what you get out, in other words, the thoughts you constantly think will manifest into your surroundings.
Aside my condition (PMDD), I’d had days or periods in life where I suffered bouts of depression and anxiety.
These mental conditions were a state of mind, triggered as an emotional response to something that may have occurred in my life at the time.
The cycle that would take place would be as follows.
When something went wrong, I reacted emotionally in a negative way and continued dwelling on negative thoughts.
Image by freepik
The Gradual Spiral
The repetitiveness of this cycle, in turn, continued to feed that state of mind — and the longer I allowed it to go on, the longer I felt depressed, anxious, or both.
The brain is the most powerful asset we have and the way we think determines how life looks — to us.
I came to realise that in many episodes of poor mental health, I was the trigger.
To better explain, the way I would think was.
Image by freepik
Not knowing how to control my thoughts meant that all it took was one single negative notion crawling through my mind to send me into a spiral.
I’d dwell on this thought, becoming absorbed by it. Before long, I’d start catastrophising, working myself into an emotional state and my actions would soon follow.
Image by freepik
A Shared Human Experience
Most of us, if not all, would have experienced some form of difficulty at different points in our lives.
In facing those challenges, many of us have struggled emotionally, or at times, needed the aid of prescribed medication to help us cope.
Looking back, what I wish I’d known then is that moving forward despite those experiences required learning how to manage my thoughts, actions, and subsequently, my emotions.
Image by freepik
When we face bad situations, many of us allow the negative emotions they evoke to guide our actions.
From my own experience, this is one of the most ineffective ways to respond, as it often leads to impulsive decisions and in turn, deeper feelings of regret that add to the frustrations.
Yes, our emotions can be a little unpredictable — after all that’s what makes us human.
How we feel is usually influenced by what we see, sense, or experience and negative emotions can take us on a rollercoaster — but only if we allow our thoughts and actions to be led by them.
Image by freepik
From Thought to Overwhelm
Let’s say for instance, something has upset you, and you naturally feel sad in the moment.
What we tend to do without realising, is repeatedly remind ourselves that we’re sad over and over again.
We then begin to manifest through our actions, what it is to feel sad. I, for instance, would curl up on the sofa, feeling low and alone, often breaking down in tears.
I would start replaying the archive of past hardships in my mind, reminding myself of how unfortunate things had been.
Image by freepik
Gradually, I’d lose interest in the activities that usually brought me joy. I’d begin to neglect my responsibilities, retreating indoors and isolating myself from friends and family.
Destructive self-criticism would take hold, and during those moments, I’d convince myself I deserved a sweet treat or comfort food — offering short-term relief but leading to longer-term consequences on my health.
This spiral would continue, worsening my condition and before I’d know it — I’ve become what I kept thinking.
The above is simply an example of how, when we’re led by our emotions, they can influence our outlook, surroundings, perception, and overall quality of life.
Image by teksomolika/freepik
Learning to Proactively Respond
When we yield to negative feelings, we can easily and without realising, allow our thoughts to encourage more of the same and dictate our actions.
This feeds into a cycle of negative thinking and emotions, worsening our environment.
I’m not saying you should ignore your emotions altogether, as that would be both unrealistic and likely impossible.
Rather, we must counteract negative thoughts with optimism and more importantly, with positive actions — practicing deep gratitude is a powerful way to support this.
Image by pikisuperstar on magnific
When we implement optimistic responses as soon as we’re able, they begin to build on one another, gradually redirecting our emotions in a more positive direction.
In doing so, we minimise the impact of a static negative mindset — a practice I term the ‘conscious mindful defence mechanism’.
It’s a process of consistently training your mind through positive reinforcement and aligned actions, so that when emotional turmoil arises, your ‘CMDM’ kicks in.
As a result, you allow yourself to be human and feel the emotions, but you never reside there — we visit, because we’re entitled to, but most importantly, we leave.
Image by freepik
Summary
Practicing this has allowed me to restore myself back to a place of peace at a quicker pace than in my past.
It has indirectly lessened the ripple effects of bad experiences, and helped me maintain a more consistent quality of life.
Living well takes practice — being happy requires more effort than people realise and takes proactive work.
It’s a process of learning how to take control of your perception, until you’re consistently seeing the glass as half full. Bouncing back, in turn, becomes second nature and even when you fall, you’re never there for long.
Imge by rawpixel.com on magnific
The thoughts you allow your mind to constantly process, will present in the way you are.
Think optimistically, even if you struggle to believe it, think it anyway, and support it with small positive actions because that’s what it means to act on faith.
It’s likely to feel a little delusional at first, but what we view as delusional, is only so, until it’s proven.
Think it until you believe it and to believe, you must keep thinking, and practicing it.
Remember, even the Bible states, ‘as a man thinketh, so is he’ — Proverbs 23:7.
