Estimated Reading Time: 17 mins
Money Matters
Firstly, a word of reassurance.
No matter your financial position currently, it doesn’t define who you are or what you might be capable of achieving in future.
There are countless people who were once where you are now and despite their circumstances at the time, they were eventually able to change their situation around.
Yes, money is a necessity worldwide and an extremely influential contributing factor in how people perceive themselves and others.
The more we have, the more confident we feel in our ability to get by in the world. When we don’t have enough, however, it can create difficulties in daily life and a sense of unworthiness.
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Money may not be everything but it’s powerful enough to influence perceptions, divide societies, drive behaviours, and impact mental health.
Irrespective of where we are in the world, we’re likely to share similarities in our beliefs towards money — mostly that we need it to survive.
We all have different relationships with money and for many of us, those relationships haven’t always been healthy.
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If we wish to be released from the destructive control it can have on our minds, we need to begin reframing our perceptions.
Taking a more proactive approach can feel difficult, but isn’t at all impossible, and regardless of how uncomfortable it might be, it’s necessary if we are to begin moving our lives forward.
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Money & Self Worth
Learning how to manage finances is not something we were all taught. Growing up in the UK, I remember studying many subjects, but real-life financial acumen was not one of them.
My immigrant parents were just as naïve when it came to their new environment, so in turn, they did not have the knowledge to then teach us.
I was fortunate enough to land myself a retail banking role in my early 20’s and this was my first real exposure to credit, its purpose, and how to attain it.
Aside that, I still had a lot of learning to do and much of that learning happened by experience — but far too late.
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My lack of awareness to my condition which I later discovered was PMDD, also greatly influenced my emotional spending.
I would buy things impulsively whilst relying completely on my employment salary, never taking into consideration that life circumstances could change without notice.
I was simply spending today with no thought for tomorrow. Eventually, I reached a point where I had barely enough to live on adequately after bills and debt repayments.
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Soon enough, the sole purpose of my job was to keep up with my debts — I needed my job, more than they needed me and my life soon felt stuck.
For any expenses out of the ordinary, I was forced to use credit cards because I no longer had any other means.
This pattern kept me enslaved to my circumstances with no foreseeable way out.
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In time, I began to despise myself. I felt trapped and overwhelmed by the suffocating uneasiness of my financial pressures, creating a sense of failure that saw my confidence plummet.
Irrespective of how my life appeared, after all, I had my home, a car, and job — I still felt like a disappointment because beneath these appearances, my life told a very different story.
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Money & Mindset
It’s possible your own financial circumstances have you feeling the same sense of overwhelm that I experienced for many years.
Perhaps you also weren’t taught the importance of financial matters, or, you may also have a condition that affects your financial judgement.
Maybe your circumstances changed unexpectedly, or like many others, it could be the rising cost of living has had a detrimental impact to your finances.
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Regardless of how your situation has arrived where it is, it’s likely impeding on your mental wellbeing and disrupting your quality of life.
Whatever your situation is today, and despite how unreachable a solution might seem, there’s one thing I’ve learnt over the years — tough seasons do not last forever.
The health of your mental wellbeing and your life will always be more valuable than currency.
So, let’s give our situation and mindset a different perspective, with the anticipation of easing a little tension because you’re not a failure — this is simply another part of your story.
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Seeing Beyond the Obvious
Think of it this way.
When we die, we cannot take our possessions, valuables, troubles, or debts with us.
The financially induced anxieties we carry and the very individuals who run the organisations we owe, will one day all be gone — so on reflection, will any of it have truly mattered?
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God did not create us for the purposes of simply existing, and He certainly didn’t create us to live a life of chronic worry and overwhelm.
Rather, the devil desires to see us broken and crushed in spirit, because he knows that if our minds stay focused on problems, we won’t have the mental capacity to walk in our true calling.
Subsequently, our ability to make an impact in the world as God desires, greatly diminishes.
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We all know when our minds are negatively impacted, so too is our ability to act purposefully.
If we feel disheartened, it’s difficult to be proactive because our mental space is now consumed by negative thoughts and emotional heaviness.
When we’re facing bills we cannot pay, or wondering how we’ll eat tomorrow, our God-given destiny is the last thing on our mind. In fact, thinking about anything else feels impossible.
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So, our circumstances may feel like a physical problem but their as much, if not more, a spiritual warfare we don’t always see.
God desires that His children live in good health, prosper, multiply, replenish the earth, exude the fruits of the Spirit, be of good cheer, and the like.
The devil will always want us to experience the exact opposite of whatever God desires for us so today, I’m simply encouraging you to view things from another perspective.
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When I was overcome by the pressures of my financial circumstances, they flooded my mind.
I couldn’t sleep, my dietary intake was poor, my presence at social events were mostly physical because I was constantly in mental distress.
If you’re living that life now, and your relationship with money is causing you to feel like a failure I understand — because I too have been there.
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You may feel like there’s no way out but like I mentioned earlier, tough seasons do not last and just because we’re down now, doesn’t mean we’ll stay there permanently.
With that being said, there’s something else my experience also taught me.
Financial problems rarely disappear by themselves, so even though we feel we only have capacity for folding into the foetus position or burying our heads in the sand, it’s time to take control to the best of our ability.
Different outcomes are possible but require proactivity and alternative approaches, even amidst existing feelings of discomfort.
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Turning Pressure into Progress
No matter our starting point, every day provides a new opportunity for us to do and experience life differently.
So, how do we adjust our financial situation to ease existing pressures and regain our confidence?
It’s true, I don’t know your exact situation and probably never will, but I want to share three things that I believe will raise your levels of hope and point you in a helpful direction — or, at the very least, help trigger ideas of your own.
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Progressive Step One.
As difficult as this will feel to do in your current position, you have to begin practicing gratitude.
It’s more powerful than people often expect and when practised regularly, it can significantly lift one’s mood.
I’ve explained it in detail here to show how it can productively improve mental wellbeing and encourage you to read when you can.
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Progressive Step Two.
Take some time to explore what support is available where you are, because we can’t benefit from help that we don’t know exists.
As an example, in the UK we have charities that can offer financial advice and provide information on debt solutions, or signpost people to other organisations that can assist with things like grants, food vouchers and similar support.
Citizens Advice, Christians Against Poverty, and Step Change are a few charitable organisations I’ve had dealings with personally that I can confidently recommend.
Those mentioned are non-profit so you can rest assured the advice they offer will only be in your best interest.
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What I’m emphasising here is, you shouldn’t have to struggle alone if it’s not necessary and many a time, most people are simply unaware of the help available to them.
Seeking support and admitting that things aren’t going well isn’t easy, but when we find ourselves in tough predicaments, finding help becomes necessary.
You deserve to live decently as a human being so don’t allow pride to get in the way of you seeking help, because as much as it matters now, this phase of your life will one day become history.
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Wherever you are, you can search to find out what help is available to you and if you don’t know where to start, you may wish to use ChatGPT like I did.
I detailed my entire situation with all my figures into the app — my prompt ended up being the length of one A4 page.
It felt more private since I was embarrassed by my situation to start with.
The results it gave were not things I would have thought of myself and although it meant I had to speak with someone eventually, it was well worth the effort.
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Just as a final word of caution.
We don’t want to worsen our situation so remember to do your due diligence on any organisation you intend to approach.
Check their ratings on official sites like Trust Pilot reviews or what people have shared about their experiences via discussion forums like Reddit and the like.
Remember, there are organisations who will try to exploit people in difficult circumstances, and they may present as though they want to help so always do thorough checks before proceeding to ensure their genuine.
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Progressive Step Three.
For many of us, the difference between what we make and what we pay out might be very slim leaving us with little surplus, if any at all, after essential costs.
The solution is easy to identify but takes far more effort to execute in reality — that being, we need far more coming in than we have going out.
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Like I mentioned earlier, we were created by God to add value to the world and in so doing, is how we may well earn more ourselves and change our situation entirely.
This could be a career change or better still, the implementation of a business idea related to our natural God-given talents and strengths.
Whatever skills you have, whether you feel their big or small — never underestimate them.
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Pursuing something different can take significant time, but nothing stops us from putting in a little effort every day.
Time will go whether we act or not, so why not work in conjunction with time and get something going for ourselves along the way.
After all, it could potentially change our lives for the best.
The pressure I felt during the difficulties of my own situation were beyond uncomfortable, but they equally solidified a compelling feeling — I never wanted to be in this position again.
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My financial problems provoked me to develop a way of looking after myself and my family.
It was time to gain value by adding value — creating something of my own using the skills, talent, passion, and abilities I already had.
Pressure feels unpleasant but it can be a privilege in that it can forcibly drive us into a path we were always meant to pursue.
Trust the abilities God has given you and do something different — because you can. What feels heavy today, can become the exact testimony somebody else needed to hear in future.
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Final Thoughts
Below, you’ll find a video presented by Myron Golden, I strongly encourage you to watch it.
If your financial situation has minimised your zest and enthusiasm for life, this will be of great encouragement and will reignite a determination to improve your quality of life.
Trust and have faith in God and His word and believe that you are what He says you are not what your current circumstances may try to dictate that you are.
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Proverbs 3:6
